February 10, 2013
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Amazing is hard to find
It doesn’t help that I justify spending the weekend I have sans kids – working on the house. I don’t go out. I’m a little afraid to go out to be honest. I organize and sort and tackle items on the “honey do” list. It ends up proving to be my undoing.
I take the time to RSVP to the wedding of friends. I’m not worried that D will attend, even though he’s friends with the happy couple. He often badmouthed them…with much eye rolling…”She’s been married 3 times. I think he’s been married four times. As if this is the match made in heaven!” I’d admonish him. He’d ignore me.
He also always, always berated me for accepting a friend request from L, because she was “crazy as hell!” He told tales about her in high school. I hadn’t been around because I was hanging out with a different crowd. He declared that he would have nothing to do with her. I shrugged, although I thought it was a bit ridiculous.
There was a bike show a few counties north of us. L went with S (apparently they are a couple now, which tickles me) and the other couple (the pair that are planning to marry) went too. D went, of course. He allowed himself to be “tagged” so that we all knew that he was social. Then he accepted the friend request from L, because he had changed his mind about her. My heart sank a bit, although I couldn’t for the life of me figure out why.
Angel me leaned in, “You’re out of sorts because you’re reeling from his unexpected behavior. You believed that he’d be discrete, and that he’d honor your wishes and stay away. Since when has he done a damned thing you’ve asked? I don’t understand why you are sooooo surprised.”
It wasn’t that. It was the fact that I knew he’d said less than complimentary things about me to mutual friends. Those things weren’t accurate. Always, he would ….Devil me interrupts, “He told lies about you. We all get it. You don’t need to revisit this.”
She’s right and she’s wrong.
Alone.
