August 29, 2012
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too much time…
I dreamed about D last night. Unbidden. My mind is always blank when I lay down to sleep. I don’t fear the dreams, but I don’t want to encourage them either.
I’m happy and content, snuggling close to D while he pulls me to him. So familiar and comforting. So real that I can feel the heat from his body along my back, his heavy leg hooking across me, his warm breath tickling my neck.
I suddenly awaken and frown in the darkness. I’m cold and alone. No one holds me. Tears prick at my eyes as I look at the clock. 3:26am. Devil me whispers, “You dream because he’s thinking of you. He misses you. He regrets letting you go.” I swipe a hand at the tears, “No. I don’t believe he thinks of me at all. He’s forgotten that I exist.”
Some things are better left forgotten. Some people are better left “lost”.
